Plateau Hell

I have been putting off updating the blog. Just wishing I could say, I was stuck in that damn plateau but now it is over! But nope, I don't get to say that. Still holding strong at 208. (Well, every now and then it bumps up to 210/211 but I figure that is water/hormones.) I did take pics and measurements on the 8th like usual but I wont bother with them because they are the same as well. It is a true plateau with no changes anywhere.

I am really just plugging along at this point. Trying to not let it bother me too much (but it does) and just keep doing what I need to. It is so hard to not get discouraged. I was really hoping to be  at least 100 down by the end of the year and I don't think I can make that goal anymore. Heck, I thought I could do all 130 in a year. And I was doing great. But now with 2 months and no changes I don't know how to make it happen. I have put on my blinders and I am just trying to keep looking at each day and doing what I need to do. I will admit that I haven't been as strict on the eating. I have been indulging. And part of it is that mentality that everyone says you need to eat more to break a plateau. But I am not eating more of the RIGHT things. And I really need to focus on that. But it is so hard. It was easier to eat right when I started. Not that I am eating bad. But not really good either. I need to get a handle on that.

I have to admit I think the dating is getting to me too. I keep telling myself I need to stop trying to meet people and date and just focus on myself. But then a weekend comes where I don't have my kids and I don't have plans or anything to do with myself except clean and workout by myself. I get lonely and start wishing for SOMEONE to just hang out with. It is pitiful. And so I post an ad. I look into dating. And I get discouraged and down on myself again. Especially when someone will decide I am not worth dating because I am "too fat" still. I know, I know. Their opinion doesn't matter. But it is still hard to not let it get you down. A double edged sward. I hate dating and the insecurity that comes with it but I am lonely all alone. *sigh*

Anway, this is a blog about weightloss not my horrible dating life and non-existntent sex life. (which of course I could have sex anytime I wanted just not a relationship to go along with it and that just isn't me. Uh, I am getting side tracked again...)

So I AM doing P90X. So far no results. But I had to take a week off. So I did 2 weeks and then had a week off because I was sick and paired with my asthma my lungs couldn't take it. I was also out of my controller meds and too broke to refill them. But now I am better and my meds are filled so I am back to it. Did Core Synergenics Monday. Plyometrics last night. Tonight is Arms and abs. Tomorrow is yoga. Friday is Legs and abs. Saturday (my favorite day) is Kenpo. And Sunday is, of course, a day of rest. :) Fingers crossed this all starts working for me again soon. Also wish me luck I can get my eating on a better track. (Like I said, it isn't bad but it isn't great. I need to get it back to being great) And especailly fingers crossed I can break off this plateau and the lbs start melting and dropping off like before. Fingers crossed.